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Tragic Parallel
November 17, 2012
Summary:
When the bus nears its final destination, two stops change the fate of all riding it. One boy boards with a mind of malicious moral purity, the other with a mind full of regret. The bus ride seems especially short that day.
As the students depart, all seems normal. For all except these two, who await fate's entanglement.
Romanovich
Tragic Parallel
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This book has 4 comments.
Romanovich BRONZE said...
on Dec. 3 2012 at 6:22 pm
Thank you, I appreciate it! As far as the perspectives go (the emperor is nameless) the original formatting was four pages for each perspective, each written straight with no chapters. Then this site wanted me to split it into chapters, so I just took out snap shots capable of describing in one word. That probably altered the way it reads quite a bit.
This was unbelievable. I can't believe you wrote this, for, as MayaS. says, your writing blows my mind. The characters sound so real, with distinct voices but yet both so real. One suggestion I can think of is for you to alternate the characters, do the emperor (I can't remember his name) at home, then Clayton at home. The emperor boarding the bus, Clayton boarding the bus. Also wouldn't everybody be in their classrooms at the time, instead of out in the halls? Amazing work, simply amazing!
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