I was the Scrooge who hates Christmas.

For the past four years,

I looked at red and green lights, 

carolers singing, 

children smiling, 

I saw no cheering gleam. 

Instead, I saw it as the antagonist of my life. 

The antagonist that took my dad's life four years ago.

Christmas was the last time I spoke to him. 

From that day on, he went into a coma and passed away two days later. 

Christmas took away my dad. 

It took away this happy-go-lucky and optimistic part of me. 

Why? 

I ask myself this question every day. 

Yes, I still miss my dad, 

but Christmas is not to blame. 

It is only the unpredictability of life itself. 

Like any other day, 

babies are born, 

couples get divorced, 

people die. 

Not everyone has a white and peaceful Christmas. 

 I am the girl who embraces Christmas. 

Now I look at red and green lights, 

carolers singing, 

children smiling, 

I see it as some sort of cheering gleam, 

and as a protagonist of my life. 

The protagonist that brought family and friends together, 

to bring me comfort through my aching soul. 

Christmas was the day I realized the significance of a community. 

From that day on, I strived to become stronger.  

Christmas taught me how to battle through life's obstacles. 

It brought out this courageous side of me. 

Don't ask how. 

I want to live life's moments to the fullest every day.