Her eyes were still the same brown that they had always been but her pupils were filled with darkness, the sadness showing in them even when she had to hold her stomach from laughing so hard. “You always laugh” the boy who sat behind her said not noticing the sadness that consumed her whole being she stared into his eyes trying not to panic from the social interaction that he would forget before he even left the classroom. Her body shook slightly and her knees bounced even as she laughed at the jokes that only her and her friends would get. The sadness almost dropped out of her eyes as she overheard the other teenagers talking about her, the salty tears so hot they almost burned begging for an escape but that would be silly to cry over something she was so used to. Maybe it was because she enjoyed food a little too much or maybe it was because she wore clothes two sizes too big but they didn’t know she wished she had clothes her own size.

The argument her parents were having seeped through the walls into her ears as she plugged her headphones in turning the volume to a level her ears almost hurt at, but she always adjusted to the way the music took all her thoughts. She had dyed her hair before and had it cut many times before but she still did not like the way it looked. The girl felt the tears from earlier finally escape her eyes as the music in her ears grew sad because she was always influenced by the beat of music and easily fell into the sadness of the song. 

Her boy texted her and she felt the tears stop she felt her heart thud once and then it stopped when she seen the text his words almost became doubled from the way her eyes had to look at them over and over she had gotten a text from him earlier saying he would be busy her heart filled with happiness when he said that because it meant he was finally able to leave his house and enjoy life even though he had been struggling but now his words made her regret ever feeling any happiness for him. He had called her baby in the message but her heart couldn’t even skip a beat at it because his other words made the vile raise in her throat as her eyes filled with the hot liquid again “I cheated on you” had followed the word baby she read it three times and then she had read it five times and then it was the only words she could hear. Her body racked in sobs with the words engraved in the back of her eyes so even when they were closed she could read them. 

He had been the guy to fix her happiness the one to lift her off her feet after a bad day and the one to tell her that her beauty was more than any other girls but now he had picked another over her and she could only read every message that followed the ones that told her that he regretted it and the ones that begged for forgiveness but she was crying so hard she couldn't even see all the words he said. Her phone flew across the room, the headphones going with it as she fell so deep into the sadness that had lurked around every corner. The girl cried so hard she couldn’t hear anything except the blood that rushed to her ears. 

Three days passed of texts back and forth between them all filled with hate, love, and sadness. When she looked in the mirror she thought her face looked slimmer but she couldn’t really tell because she always thought something about her changed but she didn’t mistake the bags that hung under her eyes or the way her body ached. Music wasn’t enough for her anymore no matter how loud she made it. Her identity was slipping through her fingers and she couldn’t grasp it; her eyes only grew darker and so did her heart. The heartbreak she faced changed the way she viewed things but one day she will feel happiness again and when she does she will enjoy every moment of it instead of taking it for granted.