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Two-Faced Love
Two weeks ago was the happiest day for my dad, he was getting married to Jeanette. With burgundy hair, a fit figure, and an independent mindset walking down the aisle towards my dad; I never thought what she could become.
“ Honey come downstairs, breakfast is ready.” I fly down the stairs ready to indulge myself in what smelled like juicy bacon, homemade cinnamon pancakes, and fresh fruit. Coming down the stairs, I started to question what I did. Her cheeks blushed with red , looking as if she was ready to boil over she whispers, “ Did you forget something last night” as I stream through what I did last night, I did everything. Trying to figure out everything I did, I cleaned the kitchen after dinner, I took a shower, then I realized what I had forgot to do. I didn't clean the bathroom last night. Cowardly speaking “ I’m sorry I went to bed early last night, I wasn’t feeling well” stuttering and hoping she would hear my sincerity. Gripping a thousand hairs, she pulled me up the stairs to the bathroom and tossed me as if I was her slave. Her voice pierced my ears “ How can you not do one simple task, worthless piece of trash!”. On the floor, an ocean of tears rushes down my face and gripping the back of my head feeling the hair that was no longer there. I slur the words “ I’m sorry” out of my mouth, not understanding why this is happening. Two months ago my dad had met a woman who had a halo over her head and happiness written all over her. She made him so happy, with the gifts and new kind of love, not being able to realize the scars she had left his children. Flashes of my mother’s face fly into my head, the only thing that had gotten me through that beating. Each swing, kick, and cut pierced my skin and worked its way through my entire body. Tasting and smelling the blood that was coming out of me, that was the moment I wish I wasn’t alone. I felt each rib pop and muscle tear through my body as she let at me. “Why!”and “ Please stop it won’t happen again”. I could feel my lungs collapsing with each breathe. Craving fresh air, I crawl out of the bathroom, my sister rushes over to help me. “ Don’t help her, she’s not worth it” Jeanette snarls at my sister “ unless you want to feel what she is feeling”. I look at my sister and shake my head, in my mind scream “ don’t do it”. Jacque stands up and walks away, the anxiety was lifted off of me. My body was just dead weight, my arms and legs were as heavy as an elephant. Feeling every nerve throb with each heartbeat, I finally pull myself up against the wall. I remember when I first met Jeanette, we went shopping all day, buying Gucci, Chanel, and Gap. She bought these for me and I loved her for buying me whatever I wanted. Feeling so loved, I thought this relationship could never be broken.
“ Here you go peasant” tossing me a toothbrush, bucket, soap, and other tools “ you will not leave this room until it sparkles like a diamond” she spits out. What felt like all night, was 4 hours cleaning that bathroom. I could see myself in the floor, the mirrors were as polished as a diamond as she wished. Coming out of the bathroom, there is a stairwell leading to the downstairs. Jeanette had my sister by the wrist, “Ding!”, here comes my dad. “ What the hell do you think you are doing with my princess!” Jacque has always been a daddy’s girl and she was my father's favorite. She loosened her grip and created some lie to help her. Standing there eyes red, every wrinkles was creased, and fist clenched he erupted “ Get into the bedroom”. Jacque runs upstairs into her room as I sit on the stairs. Hearing the fight, I here Jeanette’s voice crumble under my father’s.
“ But Tony she wasn’t listening to me” she struggled to even get the words out of her mouth. “ I don’t care, you don’t touch my kids like that, they are humans and make mistakes!”. There was a point of no return for her. All of a sudden I saw my dad’s arm in the air and clash into her face. When she fell she hit her head the metal corner of the bed and was knocked out. He walked into the dining room screeching “ kids pack your bags we are leaving right now” I questioned everything right then and there. Even though I knew what she did to me was wrong, why was he just going to leave her there? Not questioning my dad, I went into my room and packed. Speeding to the Holiday Inn hotel on US RT 30, everyone was freaking out. All other 3 siblings were wondering what happened as me and jacque were just hoping and praying that everything will be okay. We checked in and went right to the room. By then it was 8pm, everyone was tired and my sister, Jacque, was getting bandaged by my father. Closer to 9pm, someone was knocking on the door. Ariel, the oldest, walked over and opened the door 3 police officers were standing there and asked for Anthony Edward Van De North. Previously my dad had been arrested for drinking and driving. As sad as this is the law enforcement knew my dad really well. Not only was he going to be charged with assault against a women but he had gotten another DUI. They rushed in, put my dad in cuffs and my mother walks in and grabs me and jacque. All of us kids were escorted out by police, one of the most scary things I have had happen. The adrenaline pumping through my veins, every bit of pain she ever put me through came rushing into me and the tears flowing out like an ocean. I couldn’t help but to realize that it was over and I might never see my father again. I understood why they were putting my father away but then again I didn't understand why. In my mind he was just protecting us from her, he wasn’t actually trying to hurt her, it was all an accident. I wish I could have foreseen the future I realize what I have gained but lost at the same time. Right away when my mom was talking to the officer she filed a restraining order on Jeanette. She wasn’t put into jail until she recovered from her head injury, which her recovery took 3 months and she was in jail for 3 years for the abuse against my sister and I. During the trial, there was no hiding the scars and marks she left on us. Both my sister and I were covered in bruises and scars, they asked us where each of them came from. My sister and I were both sent to the hospital that night. Admitted, I didn't know what to think or say to anyone. Doctors would come in every five minutes evaluating me asking me all these questions. Some marks I couldn’t even remember where they came from at all, I had been hit in the head so many times. “ Honey I’m going to take some blood, no worries I’m not here to hurt you” the nurses gentle voice helps me lighten up about everything. After three days I was released with my sister and sent to therapy for what was suppose to be 3 weeks. Finally two weeks after the accident, the trials were done. My mom didn’t even know how to react when she found out about what Jeanette did, for the first year I only talk to Jacque about everything. We each felt something different as we went through the same thing. I only visited my dad once while he was in prison and I never really saw Jeanette. In all honesty, I never wanted to see her face again. In my mind she had ruined everything for my family, I no longer had my father and I couldn’t ever talk to my own mother. I saw a therapist for about 3 years and went through 5 weeks of medical check ups to make sure, physically, I was okay. The therapy you could say was pretty nice, I got to talk about everything and how it made me feel as a person. “ Why do you think she did this to you?” Dr. Lu tried saying it as nice as possible. I replied with a shy “ Well I think she hated me, yet fooled me into loving her. She bought gifts all the time and cooked with me.” I never fully understood how you could spend a morning lifting someone up and then rip them down as if they were a old stained wallpaper. During the medical check ups, you could tell I was torn down a lot with every scar, bump, or bruise. After I went through all the medical testing I was cleared up to go do whatever I wanted and finally act normal in my eyes. Now my sister and I could just be a happy set of sisters that make friends and have big family dinners. Life would be normal again and that’s all we ever wanted.
I learned a lot throughout this time , but there is only one lesson that truly affected me for the rest of my life. I learned that Jeanette was portraying herself in many different ways depending on audience. With my dad she was sweet, loving, and sociable. To us kids, she was evil, violent, and aggressive. To herself, she thought she was helping the world and us kids by what she was doing to us. In a picture, we were a perfect family, we were happy all the time, went on tons of vacations together, and went shopping for hours together. If only people could look past the one way glass they would see a world of hurt, pain, and oppression.
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With was the hardest paper I ever wrote. haveing to go back so many years and try to sum up 9 years of pain coming to an end. Writing this was very emotional but I am happy that I am able to share what I went through. Writing my memior allows other readers that have gone through the same thing, that it gets better.