What did I do? I don't know | Teen Ink

What did I do? I don't know

November 7, 2023
By Anonymous

Lately I've been asking myself the same question. What did I do? Every morning and every night I ask myself this. I've been asking myself this for the last month now. I don’t know what or how this started but it’s been sort of bothering me. 


I’m actually starting to wonder what I did. Did I forget something important? Did I get into something new? Did I fall in love? 


To be honest I don’t know what I did yet. I could’ve done anything at this point. I could’ve done something good or bad and I'll probably never know.


I wish I could get a clear answer but I know that’s not possible. I know they will never give me a clear answer. That’s okay I guess. I'm probably not worth their time anyways. They all have their lives together and have people who are there for them. I sort of don’t right now. 


My life goes in random directions. One day I'll want to do something that will be beneficial and the next day something random will happen. I know It’s all out of my control but I kind of wish I did have some control. 


Sometimes I wish I was like everyone else. I wish random things didn’t happen every couple of months. I wish I didn’t ask myself the question everyday. 


I just want to know what I did. I just want to feel normal for once. I just want to stop feeling bad for once. I just want to enjoy life even if it's for a couple of minutes. 


I wish I could answer the question I've been asking myself. I’ll obviously never know but I guess that’s ok. I know I'll probably forget about it until later. 


The author's comments:

This has been bothering me so I thought I would write about it


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