I am back again to the very same point where I began.There hasn’t been the slightest of progress.Its all been a meaningless pursuit chasing things that were never really mine.The false sense of security that owning them momentarily brought in has long faded away and harsh reality dawns on me.I began alone and I have to walk alone.Probably forever alone.I do not blame others for this state of mine for it is I who have damned myself for what I seek is merely an illusion, an idea that doesn’t hold true in the real world:the illusion of perfection..One that that keeps enticing me and which forever appears to be just out of reach . It calls on me to make one desperate lunge for it ,declaring that it will be mine forever.My fingers tighten around it and the mind is pleased with the sense of attainment but this is soon replaced by disappointment as it realises the duplicity involved. What it has managed to grasp is merely thin air. Probably attainment and perfection are contradictory words.Attainment never really translates into perfection. The very fact that something can be attained makes it appear more and more lacking in perfection.Why is it that i cannot end this search and thereby my disappointments. Life cannot be expected to be perfect, it just has to be lived.

And it is this journey itself ,this pursuit for perfection wherein perfection lies........