Finally... | Teen Ink

Finally...

February 28, 2009
By Anonymous

After my Grandfather died, My mind was cracked. Suddenly, My happy little lifestyle become one of what half the world would call... "Emo." I think the word Emo is unrespectable, and too mean.

I started failing in school. Soon, It wasn't just because of my Grandfather. I didn't know why. But soon, scars appeared on my wrists and legs. I found no other way out.

My mom didn't notice it, until one night, in the middle of a fight. I yelled,

"I want to kill myself,"

Which at the time was true. She grabbed my shoulders, and shook me with all her might. I started to cry hysterically.

"Go to your room!" She screamed. I ran, crying.

Later, that week. I was introduced to Brooke. One of the many people who helped me on my way. My counseler. Brooke lasted for about 5 months, until the help didnt.. help.

I was newly introduced to Erica. Who is my withstanding counseler. And I must say, I have improved. Going from crying each night, to leaping happily with my friends. From scars, to scarless wrists. It's a huge accomplishment.

After 2 years of this, I met a new person with my cure. My Docter. He prescribed me pills. I remember the day clearly.

"Do you want help, Hannah?" He asked me.

"Yes," I answered.

"Would a hospital help?"

At this, I looked at my mom. She was crying into her hands.

"Well, I just want to get happy again," I said stupidly. So the tension, and the thought of a Mental Hospital hung between us.

But, A month on the anti-depressants. The cuts dissapeared. The happiness returned. At first, It was a new emotion. One I had never felt in a long time. But I liked it. I got better grades in school. My mom and I don't get in as many fights.

But when I look down at my wrists, and my ankles. I see the faint imprint of what was. And, as much as I want it to go away, Im glad It's there. It's reminded me of what I was, And what I have become.

Finally...



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