" Hey hun,
I know this is wrong I shouldn't do this over the phone; especially on voicemail.” she sniffles quietly. " we haven't be right for awhile now we're just not the same anymore. I'm so so sorry I shouldn't do this over the phone" she fake laughs it's dry and brittle "I've said that before. I....ummm... don't know how to say this, but here goes it. I think we should break up. Please don't say you don't know what I'm talking about, we can't just keep pretending we're fine. We don't talk anymore, and we sleep in the same bed" she half laughs half cries. " this isn't how it was supposed to be , well of course not. But I can't do it,I can't pretend we're fine, we're not. We're ghosts living in the shells of lovers. I don't know who you are anymore, for god sakes I don't even know who I am. " the phone goes dead quiet, other than her muffled cries for what seems like hours but was probably 30 or so seconds " I love you please please know that but I don't want to be a Ghost anymore, when you get home my stuff will be gone. I'm so sorry I love you so much, I'm sorry, wow that's only the thousandth time saying that words can't tell you how sorry I am. I guess this is the end. I love you ok I love you. I think I need to find myself again then maybe we can try again, but don't wait in me go find someone. Someone great, who loves you like I once did. Forget me, ok? Well I guess this really is the end. I love you, but I'm not in love with you. Don't forget I never wanted to hurt you. Take care of her, ok?"


The voicemail plays over again in head, it's been months. I called her back so many times, they were never returned.

As much as I hate to admit it she was right. We weren't ok.

I wasn't ok.