You should date Lucy, not Lucy Lou but Lucy May.  The girl you use to stare at months on end.  You followed her to the grocery store; you watched her pick up a tomato and smell for ripeness.  You would blush every time she caught you staring at her.  I thought she would grimace but she didn’t seem to notice.  She dropped her groceries to the ground and you swooped in like a hero.  You gave them back to her as you stared into her gray orbs.  You offered to walk her to her car but she refused.  As you walked away, you turned and waved goodbye, but she didn’t seem to notice.  You watched her to get into the car with her sister.  You know this because they looked alike with that beautiful blood like hair, but her sister’s eyes were green. 

You followed them all the way home.  You watched her read a book with no words in it.  She ran her hands over the pages and seemed to mimic words.  Why? I couldn’t see a word on that page with my binoculars.  Before bed she would always put drops in her eyes.  I climbed up to the window of her bedroom and watched her as she fell into a deep slumber.  She looked at me.  She stared blankly at me as if she didn’t know I was there.  Immediately I ran back to my car, scared.  Am I a coward? Why was I scared? 

I was one of the hottest people in high school but she still didn’t notice me or anyone else.  She didn’t have friends but she did always carry a stick.  Hitting people with it like an angry old lady.  She would mumble a “sorry” to everyone.  I avoided her because she was a loser and I was popular.  Do you think she remembers?  Hopefully she doesn’t because I love her, but every time I try to talk to her or even approach her she would avoid me. Anytime she had family gatherings she would sink into her seat.  She tried to go unnoticed, pulling herself into a dark abyss within herself.

That night I knocked on the door and asked to see her. I asked you out that day.  You said “yes.” You touched my face to figure out my features. You skimmed my lips and your eyes instantly fell to the ground.  Were you scared I wouldn’t kiss you?  Couldn’t you see the pure desire in my eyes?  We went on dates after that.  We even went to see the Northern Lights.  You didn’t seem to notice the beauty above you.  How?  We sat on the edge of that cliff watching the lights dance across the sky, but your face showed confusing and anxiety.

I watched you put in your eye drops and I asked you why.  “I didn’t listen to my momma and stared at the sun too long.” I wondered what you meant. Were you that rebellious of a child?  We wake up and I dropped off at your house. Then I followed you to your doctor’s office.  “It’s a corneal disease,” he said. You didn’t cry that day. Why?  You have a disease and you’re not worried. I took you to dinner that night. I picked you up and we went to your favorite restaurant. I stared into your gray pools as I started to sweat.  My fingers trembled over the box; hopefully you could see my love.