Risks | Teen Ink

Risks

February 7, 2012
By Cortney.Lynn GOLD, Hughesville, Pennsylvania
Cortney.Lynn GOLD, Hughesville, Pennsylvania
19 articles 2 photos 12 comments

The first day of summer was the start of something new. It’s the time to switch from jeans to shorts but you feel your legs are fat and you’re afraid to unleash them. But there’s not much of a choice. You head to the last day of school, seeing girls with their perfect legs. Knowing that’s what the guys want. You feel like every step you leave an earthquake because you can feel your legs jiggle. Knowing that’s not what the guys want. Glad it’s the last day of school.

The bell rings for last period to end and I’m ready to reach the doors of the school. I hear someone call my name and turn slowly to see who. It’s a boy, one of the hottest in our school. He hands me a piece of paper and simply says “Hope to see you there.’ And winks. Glancing at the paper in big letters saying, “ POOL PARTY AT MY HOUSE! GOING TO BE A BLAST!” I sigh and throw the paper in my back pocket, “Yeah right, like I’ll be seen in a bikini.”

Later that night when laying in bed glad to be seeing the end of the perfect girls for awhile my phone rings. I don’t recognize the number but decide to answer anyway
Me: “Hello?”
Mitch: “Hey, how come you never came to my pool party?”
Oh it’s Mitch I thought to myself. “Ahh, Didn’t get the chance to I was pretty busy.”
Mitch: “Oh..”
Me: “Yeah, but maybe next time”
Mitch: “How about tomorrow? You can come over and we can hang out?”
Me: “You want to hang out with me? But I don’t fit in with your crowd…”
Mitch: Why does that matter? It’s me you’re going to be with, not my crowd.
Me: “Well I guess I can..” and hung up.
I roll off my bed and put on the bikini top and thought to myself, “That doesn’t look too bad. I don’t have a big belly” Then I slide on the bottoms and remembered why I don’t enjoy wearing bikinis and turned off the lights. “I look better in the dark.” And went to bed.

The summer sun shining through my open window woke me up the next morning to the death of seeing myself in a swim suit. I got in the shower and stood there forever trying to figure out what I was going to do and trying to figure out why one of the hottest boys in the school wanted to hang out with me. Is it a joke? Stepping out of the shower with my wet hair sticking to the back of my neck I saw a missed call on my phone. It was Mitch. I checked my voice mail and there I heard, “Hey, don’t bail on me today, come over at 12ish.” I sat down on the floor thinking “what am I going to do….”

I finished getting ready and packed up my suit in my cute Aero bag and headed over to Mitch’s house. When I got there he was already outside by the pull in his swim trunks. “He has nothing to be embarrassed about, his body is perfect..” I whispered to myself.
Walking closer saying “Ahh, I don’t have my suit on..”
Mitch: Well that’s alright! You can go in the house and put it on; I’ll be waiting out here.”

I walk into his house not sure where I’m going, his mother shows me where a bathroom is and I go to change. Looking at myself in the mirror, scared of my own reflection. I wrap the towel around me and head to the pool.
Mitch: “Ready to get in?”
Me: “I guess so..”
Slowly taking the towel off and setting it on the chair besides me I walk over to Mitch and without even getting the chance to think about what he will think he pushes me into the pool. He laughs and jumps in with me.
Mitch: “Have you never hung out with a guy before?”
Me: “Not like this…”
Mitch: “I must be special.”

After changing back into my clothes and getting ready to walk back home to my house Mitch stops me and decided to walk me home. At first it was awkward and we didn’t talk at all then out of nowhere Mitch says “You look really good in a bikini.” I fake a smile and start at the ground in front of me. We reach my house and Mitch gives me a huge smiles, “Hey, let’s hang out again sometime.” And starts running back home. “Yeah sure, but next time I’d rather have my normal clothes on.” I say to myself.

Three in the morning I walk up to my phone going off, 4 missed calls. Then it goes off again, this time I answer sleepily.
“Hey”
Mitch: “You’re awake!”
Me: “I wasn’t a second ago, why are you calling me?”
Mitch: “Well I could tell it was awkward for you today to wear a suit and I understand that’s why you didn’t come to my party.”
Me: “oh… okay.”
Mitch; “But I think you looked really good in it and I can’t stop thinking about you.”
Me: “…..”
Mitch: “Will you go out with me? I think I really like you”
Me: I don’t fit in with your crowd, I can’t date you. Goodnight Mitch.”

Mitch never talked to me again after that. He was the only guy who has ever liked me and accepted my body that way. I did like him and I wanted to date him but I couldn’t. Well I felt I couldn’t because I’m not like his friends. I’m not perfect and smart. Now I look back on that day and regret it, wish that I could go back in time and say yes.. “Yes Mitch I will go out with you.” It’s too late. I was stuck in a world where I thought, “Guys don’t like girls like me.”


The author's comments:
The main topic of this is that you need to take risks, something good might come out of them. Don't do something because you feel someone else my not like it, do it because you want to. Who cares if you don't fit in.

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