How would you start a story that doesn't have a happy ending…  While I guess that I spoiled it for you, I'll just start…
I’ll save you the tears and the sad pity story, my name is Amber and I have cancer, epilepsy ,depression… and a long list of other things but that's for a different story… and this is my story.  Sorry to burst your bubble but this isn't a fairytale and I'm not a princess and I don't have      prince there's no castle and no one is rescued. I die and leave everyone I know and love with no choice.
I was 10 when the cancer had started, it was in the middle of the night and I had gotten up to go to the bathroom and my vision was blurry and I had lost my balance and fell down the stairs and had a seizure my parents drove me to the hospital and then we found out it was a brain tumor, so the usual had happened treatment, surgery, radiation, and chemotherapy after awhile it started to work.
Than one night I woke up and I couldn't breath, my lungs were starting to fail and I started to seize and it hit… the cancer had spread to my lungs when they did the xray it light up like a christmas tree.  I guess you could say it was bound to happen…. there is no happy ending to incurable cancer.
So after awhile it was back to normal, kind of, my mom had told the doctor I was depressed because she believed I was unhappy and that I was starving myself, so the doctor assigned me to a therapy group for kids who had cancer and was going through…. depressing isn't a side effect of cancer it's a side effect of dying.
So then the routine began 8 types a pills a day 3 times a day, doctor's appointments and the worst part of it was group having to sitting in a circle with 12 people saying what they had how they felt and so on and after my mom picking me up everyday at 5:30.
It’s November 5th and it been two hours of being in the hospital I open my eyes and get up to go to the bathroom and then I realize it I turn around and there I am laying there…. I’m dead… I don't expect anyone to notice that I've stopped breathing. My mom started drinking ever since I got cancer.  Its add up more over the years and right now she's passed out drunk with the empty bottle of whiskey in her hand, sitting in the chair next to my bed with tears slipping down her face.
The doctors come in and wake my mom, they said that the cause of my death was because the cancer had spread to my heart and stopped the blood flow… They said it a good thing that I was asleep, because at least I passed peacefully. I know they were only saying that to comfort my mom.. But what no one knows is I didn't pass peacefully… I've been died inside this whole time and now my body has died, not a lot of people know what's it like to know that you're not gonna grow up, get old, have kids and die with the one you love… No because what I knew was I was gonna die before my mom, it was gonna be painful, cold and I was gonna be alone.
As I stand there looking at myself cold, pale, and dead, I look up to see my mom awake and looking at me crying.  Looking up, crying and screaming why as she falls to the floor on her knees pulling me out of bed and holding my body and I realize this isn’t my story its my moms. I'm the one holding my mom screaming crying and drinking to numb the pain.
My moms name is Amber she got cancer, she had therapy, chemotherapy and surgery.  Then after surgery she had depression, she had epilepsy and she doesn't get to see me grow up, she doesn't get to see her grandkids and she doesn't get to become a grandma… and she died alone and in pain because I let her because I thought syrup could help me when I wasn't the one who needed help .. The doctors are sitting there trying to comfort me…. but they can't…. because my mom is dead…. and this isn't a fairytale…. there's no happy ending to this story… I tried to warn you.