“Hey, are you even listening to me?” Kamal cried out in exasperation.

“Yeah, mm-hmm,” I replied, still not taking my eyes off her.

“Dude, she sits right next to you in class. Eat your lunch and snap out of it.”

“Okay, yeah…alright,” I said, not altogether sure of what he was talking about.

“Oh Holy Father!! Sameer is in LLOOOVVEE!! Sam is in love with--”

“—alright, say the name out loud and I’ll smash your face into tomato pulp!”

It was Recess and as Kamal said, I had not opened my lunch-box, much less eat it.

A few students were eavesdropping and the last thing I needed was publicity of my …well it wasn’t love…more like a crush!

Anyway, hi…I am Sameer Rajaram Rathod a.k.a Sam. My school’s name is St. Joseph High School and and I am in tenth. The girl in question is a newcomer and she is my bench-partner (I admit, my heart did a little tap-dance when Mrs. Pramodini made her sit next to me). After that, I’ve never been able to take my eyes off her, or stop thinking about her. I mean, I’ve had some other crushes, but none made an impact on me like …wait did I tell you her name??...Oops, sorry. Well, her name is Shefali Sinha.

Cute name, innit?

Well, yesterday was Friendship Day and I was surprised that she wished me, and even more when she took out a band that she had bought for me! (My insides were squirming with delight when she tied it to me)

I don’t know why, but I think she likes me too… for starters she brought a Friendship band for me! And she laughs at my lamest jokes (by lamest I mean the kind that Kindergarten children groan at). She says I am cool to be around and that I was her best ‘boy’ friend!! So, you see I was pretty confident of getting a yes for an answer.

5 months passed. I still didn’t get the guts to profess my love to her.
On the last day of tenth and school, I knew this was the last chance I had. After that she would go to Mumbai and I to Pune. I somehow mustered up my courage (which was not more than a table spoon) and went up to her. She was standing there with her friends near the stage. Her eyes lit up when she saw me.

“Hey, can I speak to you for a sec?” I asked her.


Her friends started giggling. The giggling sounded as if it was playing in loop, I had half a mind to run away from there, and believe me, if you have heard what five silly, foolish girls giggle like...you would know what was going in my mind!

Shefali looked at me quizzically. “Yeah. What happened?”

I hesitated. “Umm…not here. I mean I wanted to talk to you.”

Thank God she understood.

One of them, a girl with ridiculously large specs spoke up, “Go on now Shef. You must not keep him waiting!”



Another one with wavy and disoriented hair that she had obviously and unsuccessfully tried to comb using a lot of oil said, “Yeah, he wants to talk to you!”

The giggling became almost hysterical and they were seriously starting to annoy me. A hint of a smile played on Shef’s… err… Shefali’s lips. She beckoned me to the cycle shed.


“Yes? What happened?” She asked, her wide green eyes boring into mine.

I swallowed. Beads of sweat were starting to form on my forehead. I wiped them off.

She saw it too.

“What happened Sam? Anything wrong?”


“Umm… the thing is Shefali that … umm…” I cleared my throat.


You can do this, I told myself, you’re the man!



I took a deep breath.

“I love you,” my voice came out as a timid squeak.

“Sorry what? Didn’t catch that last line. Are you alright?”

“Yeah, yeah. I am fine.”

Why was this so hard now? I had practiced this line for million of times in front of the mirror (to be more specific, in front of the bathroom mirror).

“I love you,” this time it came out loud, well… more loudly than I expected.

She stared at me, her mouth open, showing her perfectly set white teeth gleaming in the sunlight.

After what seemed to me like an eternity, she replied.

“Oh… umm…that is … well I… I am flattered. But--”


My mind went on a rampage. NO, no, no!!! Not the ‘B’ word please!

“—you see, I just considered you as a good friend. I mean you were my best boyfriend, I mean male friend but I don’t share your feelings. Please understand…”

“ Yeah, uhh right,” my voice was a frog’s croak.

“ Oh please don’t get me wrong. I just--”


“—Yeah okay. Got it. See you around then.”


I sprinted from there. She kept calling after me. But I just ran. Tears were threatening to spill. I let them.


It was the single most worse day of my life! I didn’t know where I was running, or who I was running from. The only thing that I paid attention to was that while running I had accidentally stepped on a cow dung shitted neatly on the foot path… my new Reeboks were totally spoiled!


~~~~~~****~~~~~~

I strode into the classroom and sat on the second bench. I am in college now. Today was the first day. I felt exhilarated.

Nothing much happened since that last incident. Except that I swore to never develop a crush on anyone! And also that I grew a moustache, and not a very good one.

I had stuck to my oath religiously and had never broken it… yet!


The first time I set my eyes on her, I didn’t dare look away, for fearing of jolted awake from this beautiful illusion. She walked into the classroom, her head held high, her brown hair tied back in a ponytail. All the male eyes followed her as she made her progress towards the bench in front of me. She smiled at me as she sat and my oath tumbled out of my head! Man… she was stunning! The professor entered, a short man with a paunch and a bristling toothbrush moustache.
"Here goes nothing!" I sighed.