I'm Still Here | Teen Ink

I'm Still Here

July 29, 2012
By Hobbles SILVER, Merritt, Other
Hobbles SILVER, Merritt, Other
5 articles 0 photos 28 comments

Favorite Quote:
Either you love bacon or your wrong!----unknown

The tears fall savagely from my face as they lower his small coffin into the ground. Then like a whisper I here, "I'm still here". I look around me, but the only people there are my family and they are crying as well. I re-focus on the tragedy in front of me and hug my mom.

My eyes are welling over as I prepare to press the razor to my skin and cut the pain away. I brace myself until I hear. "Please stop. I'm here. I'm still here." So I stop. I throw away the razor and scream and cry. "PLEASE! PLEASE TALK TO ME AGAIN! PLEASE COME BACK!" I bawl at the ceiling. But of course he can't hear me. Of course he doesn't answer me.

The tears are falling from my face again. This time from relief. I'm graduating high school. I recieve my awards then I'm congratulated and hugged by my family. For one split moment I think, "If only he was here to celebrate with me. If only he could be with me today." And I hear it again, "I'm still here. And I'm proud of you." I smile. To myself. To him.

Fast-forward a few years and I'm getting married. I'm crying tears of happiness now. My husband-to-be says, "I do." When it's my turn I say, "I do". I hear "you may now kiss the bride". My newly-wed-husband leans in and kisses me gently. As we walk down the aisle I think, "He should be here watching me. He should be celebrating with me."After all the pictures and all the hugs my husband and I start walking to our car. I'm just climbing in when I hear, "Don't worry. I'm still hear... And I'm celebrating."

The author's comments:
I know that it's not finished. This is about half of my 1st draft, so there will be spelling mistakes and things. Please tell me what you think so far. Thank You!

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This article has 4 comments.

Hobbles SILVER said...
on Sep. 25 2012 at 1:32 pm
Hobbles SILVER, Merritt, Other
5 articles 0 photos 28 comments

Favorite Quote:
Either you love bacon or your wrong!----unknown

This is partially based on a true expirience. My baby brother died 3 years ago, and I'm always thinknig about what the future will be like without him. I thank everyone so much for their comments and ratings. I have done many new drafts and finished it. (Officially) and called it; I'm Still Here (Finished) so keep your eyes open for it. I hope you all look at this new one and pass the owrd on to your friends.   Thanks so much for reading/commenting/rating. I appreciate this so much.   Hobbles 

on Sep. 24 2012 at 9:45 pm
FishboytheWriter PLATINUM, Nogales, Arizona
21 articles 0 photos 14 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Chaos, disaster, and disorder-My work here is done." --Mr. Fontes

Loved it! If this is based on a true experience I'm Sorry. Though it'd still be as great.

Basilisk0wl said...
on Sep. 21 2012 at 2:38 pm
Basilisk0wl, Colchester, Other
0 articles 0 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
Mad Hatter: "am i going mad?"
Alice: "Yes, you're mad, bonkers, off your head. But i'll tell you a secret... All the best people are."

I really like this! Well done! :D 

on Aug. 7 2012 at 9:51 pm
WretchedCorpse SILVER, Belvidere, New Jersey
6 articles 9 photos 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
"You will be the happiest of women. And we shall sing, all by ourselves, til we swoon with delight! You're crying! You're afraid of me! And yet I am not really wicked. Love me and you shall see! All I wanted was to be loved for myself."

omg, I love this story! its very well written and its just... amazing. I love it!!!