Adversity Day | Teen Ink

Adversity Day

September 3, 2010
By palha6 SILVER, Brooklyn, New York
palha6 SILVER, Brooklyn, New York
6 articles 1 photo 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I dont believe in working harder but instead, in working smarter."


Tomorrow is a day I can never forget. A day every young adult longs to come. But for me, it’s the very next event in my exultant life. That’s right my birthday. This birthday is the commencement of my adult life. This day is a really ecstatic moment that I can’t suppress. Every 18th birthday of every child would be the best. It was suppose to signify that I am mature enough to take care of myself.


Along with my birthday, I had just gotten my driver’s license today. The thrill came as I gradually obliterated the envelope, being careful to save the letter. Procuring the letter, I browsed through the it like an keen beast edgily waiting to obtain it’s prey. I gazed at the bottom of the letter, and a firm card lay fixed on the paper. Taking the card, I grasped it near my chest and jumped up and down with glee. My grandparents came into the room, with the utter most perplexed look on their face. Grandma picked up the letter which was thrown carelessly on the floor by a ignorant me. She held it up so Grandpa could see as well. Squinting their eyes, a smile ran up their face and Grandpa slowly opened his mouth diminutive mouth.

“ Well…” His hands were extended, and I sprang to him and gave him the warmest hug ever. I could feel Grandma’s hand patting me on the shoulder.

“ We‘re proud of you, Drake. We knew your life led to success the day you were born. Prayer is always the key to achievement. Thank God.” Grandma reassured me.

Grandma and Grandpa were a religious advocates. I was too, I guess, but I’m not really a practicing catholic. I mean with work on one hand and school on the other, I just didn’t have time.

“ It‘s 10:35 dear, we have to go to sleep and you do, too,” whispered Grandma. Despite my age,
she still treats me like a 10 year old, but I guess I was tolerable with that. “ Tomorrow is your big day!”

As I keenly went upstairs, all I could think about was that black corvette that lingered in the auto shop waiting to be purchased by me. That car was the reason I went to driving school. The urge to pass driving school, turned my heart into an ache. But I tried desperately not to think about it. As I fell asleep, I put all my dreams at bay and thought of the realty that was to come tomorrow.

PEEP PEEP! PEEP PEEP! I extended my hand out to feel the circular glassy button on my alarm clock. Silence prevailed the room as I climbed out of my bed. I headed straight for the bathroom, not even bothering to immaculate my bed. I promptly brushed my teeth and put my crisp white shirt and dress pants on. Even though it was my birthday, I still had to go to work. I vigorously gazed into my cabinet for my dress shoes to match my clothes. At the bottom of the cabinet, all I could see was my sneaker that never went dirty.

“ Grandma!! Did you see my shoes?”

“ Come downstairs, dear. I have a surprise for you!” she yelled, ignoring my inquiry.

What! A birthday surprise already! I thought, Wow, that’s a start to a new day already or should I say new year.

I scurried downstairs, like a mouse running away from it’s predator. Grandma was waiting for me, holding a box, a shoebox. I leisurely confronted her as she held out the package towards me. I slowly, but surely took it out of her hand and peeked into it. As soon as I knew what it was, I threw off the lid and embraced it. It’s a habit for me to toss things across the room like that. Yes, it was another pair of sneakers to my collection. Not as breathtaking as a black corvette, like the one I was hoping to obtain, but still something I needed. I put them on and they fit exactly.

“ Awww… Grandma, you know you didn’t have to, ”

“ I know, but I did. I mean you’re the best grandson and I can’t replace you.”

Tears started progressing down Grandma’s face, but I struggled to hold mine back.

“ Go into the kitchen, Drake.”

I stepped into the kitchen and my grandpa was there with the birthday cake. I walked over to read the words iced on the cake.
Happy Birthday, Drake! From, Grandma and Grandpa

There was a candle already lit and I bent down as the voice of two old grandparents sang “Happy Birthday”. I filled my mouth with wind and let it escape as they attacked the fire. A miniature slim line of smoke ended up in the result of the encounter.

My grandpa held out my present, just the way my grandma did. It was too small to be a car and oddly shaped to be a key. But I concluded that it was a box that contained the key to my corvette, a spacious box. As I ripped the gift wrapping, I found out it was a book. My hopes were up, I would never get that black corvette. I gashed it up some more with my hands to discover that it was a blue bible. The kind of blue that you can reflect to when your poignant or discontented. I was filled with wrath, as I through the bible across the room.

“ Are you kidding me? With all those things out their that I treasured, you give me a bible!!” my voice started to propel.

Grandpa opened his eyes broadly and simultaneously collapsed. I stare at my grandma her eyes who were bloodshot red from the scene that had just occurred. I was petrified, what did I just do? I swiftly picked up the telephone and dialed 911, not letting my eyes depart Grandpa‘s body. My grandma
was sitting next him, tears rapidly be dropped one after the other.

“ 911, how may I help you?”

“ Can you send an ambulance, please? It’ s an emergency. My Gra.. Grandpa just collapsed.” I strived not to stutter.

“ They‘ll be right there.”

Before I knew it, I could hear the sound of the ambulance truck across the street. Next thing you know, they were knocking on our door. I instantly progressed to the door and opened it, standing at the side to let the paramedics pass. They picked Grandpa up and put him on a stretcher.

“ Is he going to be alright?” Grandma desperately tried to get answers out of them.

I was about to leave and follow them, when Grandma grabbed my chest and pushed me back.

“ You stay here you…you.” Not finding the right words she closed the door as she paced away.

I stood there laying on the floor, speechless. I looked across the room and there it was the blue bible. I held it in my hand as it reflected my heart. I gradually opened the first page and began reading it. After 7 days, still postured on the floor, I finished reading my last page and no one had arrived home or called. The only thing I ate was the words on the page. I placed the bible on the floor next to me and when I looked at it, at the back of the bible, attached was the key to my corvette. At the bottom, it was written From, Grandpa. My heart stopped….


The author's comments:
I hope readers can learn the lesson resulting in this story: be happy with what you have because they're not going to be there for forever.

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This article has 19 comments.


palha6 SILVER said...
on Sep. 13 2010 at 10:58 pm
palha6 SILVER, Brooklyn, New York
6 articles 1 photo 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I dont believe in working harder but instead, in working smarter."

Im sorry but I dont even read those books :(

on Sep. 12 2010 at 2:29 pm
meganwagner21 PLATINUM, Old Bridge, New Jersey
42 articles 0 photos 139 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Sometimes good things have to fall apart so better things can fall together.&quot; -Marilyn Monroe<br /> &quot;Nobody can go back and make a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.&quot; -Maria Robinson

no problem!

on Sep. 12 2010 at 12:43 pm
BrookeAlison SILVER, Rancho Santa Fe, California
8 articles 0 photos 15 comments

Jessi,

I think that might be the one I'm thinking about, glad to know I wasn't just going delusional! :p


palha6 SILVER said...
on Sep. 11 2010 at 6:52 pm
palha6 SILVER, Brooklyn, New York
6 articles 1 photo 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;I dont believe in working harder but instead, in working smarter.&quot;

Yeah, well that's why there are editors. But your right, my grammar isn't paticulary correct

palha6 SILVER said...
on Sep. 11 2010 at 6:51 pm
palha6 SILVER, Brooklyn, New York
6 articles 1 photo 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;I dont believe in working harder but instead, in working smarter.&quot;

That's not a bad idea actually. A sequel? I'll consider that thought! Thank mimirocks124!

Whylime said...
on Sep. 11 2010 at 5:56 pm
Whylime, Brentwood, Tennessee
0 articles 0 photos 157 comments

Favorite Quote:
Grief is the price we pay for love -- Queen Elizabeth ll<br /> Don&#039;t go there, I&#039;ll only follow -- ??? <br /> Why is a raven like a writing desk? -- The Mad Hatter from Alice in Wonderland<br /> Chewing gum is really gross, chewing gum I hate the most -- Willy W.

I'll first start by saying this is a very good idea and great message and fairly well written. BUT this site is used to become a better author so I'm going to point out some things that I didn't like.

 1) there were a few grammar errors-- mostly comma ussage, but that can be fixed. If you forgot all those silly comma rules just look them up online for a guide (I personally like using my grammar textbook because I have horrid grammar) 2.) "As I keenly went upstairs..." Keenly seemed unnecessary and didn't fit the sentence for me. 3.) "PEEP! PEEP!" Isn't it "Beep Beep!"? Haha maybe your alarm clock sounds this way but I just found it kinda strange... made me think of chicks..? You can keep it if you want but I thought I'd just let you know... 4.) "I vigorously  gazed into my cabinet..." The adjective "vigorous" does not fit because it has a different meaning then what you thought. Maybe you meant "quickly" but I think your can do without an adjective completely. 5.) "I scurried downstairs, like a mouse running away from it's predator.." didn't work well for me either. The analagy hinted towards a fear because a mouse would be afriad of a predator. But the character wasn't scared, only moving quickly. Perhaps something like "Drake ran down the stairs like an excited five-year-old"? 6.) Basicly, cut down on adverds like quietly, quickly, happily, sadly... ect. Don't stop using adverbs completely though because they can be very helpful. But over- ussage can really hurt your writing.

Overall I really, really liked this story because few people are thankful for what they have until they lose it. I hope you will take my suggestions to mind and continue to write becuase i think you have great talent! And if you want, I'd appreciate a harse critique on my story, "Does He Know" if you have time. Thanks!


on Sep. 11 2010 at 3:48 pm
meganwagner21 PLATINUM, Old Bridge, New Jersey
42 articles 0 photos 139 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Sometimes good things have to fall apart so better things can fall together.&quot; -Marilyn Monroe<br /> &quot;Nobody can go back and make a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.&quot; -Maria Robinson

i think its relly a gud idea. im not too crazy abt the ending but maybe there will be a sequel?

also, please read some of stuff, wud rellly appreciate it


palha6 SILVER said...
on Sep. 11 2010 at 11:25 am
palha6 SILVER, Brooklyn, New York
6 articles 1 photo 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;I dont believe in working harder but instead, in working smarter.&quot;

 Thanks Blue4 & I'll read yours too.

on Sep. 11 2010 at 10:22 am
Blue4indigo PLATINUM, Sturbridge, Connecticut
24 articles 0 photos 382 comments

Favorite Quote:
I&#039;d rather be sorry for something that I did than for something I didn&#039;t do.<br /> -Red Scott

That was a wonderful story, your description was especially great. 5/5!

By the way, would you read some of my stories, rate and critisize? I'd appreciate that.


palha6 SILVER said...
on Sep. 11 2010 at 12:18 am
palha6 SILVER, Brooklyn, New York
6 articles 1 photo 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;I dont believe in working harder but instead, in working smarter.&quot;

Thanks jessi!

jessi GOLD said...
on Sep. 10 2010 at 11:05 pm
jessi GOLD, Nunya, Florida
15 articles 4 photos 115 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;When injustice becomes law, rebellion becomes duty.&quot;

Yeah, there's a story similair to this one in one of the Chicken Soup for Teens books, except its the dad and its ALOT shorter, and its a check for the exact amount of the car. 

Good writing style!


on Sep. 8 2010 at 10:28 pm
BrookeAlison SILVER, Rancho Santa Fe, California
8 articles 0 photos 15 comments
Oh okay haha I'm sorry I guess it was just really similar

palha6 SILVER said...
on Sep. 8 2010 at 9:44 pm
palha6 SILVER, Brooklyn, New York
6 articles 1 photo 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;I dont believe in working harder but instead, in working smarter.&quot;

No actually I combined a few of my mother's stories to create a new one. It's my own story maybe your pastor told a story similar to mine, as that's a different thkng, but I'm glad you like it!

on Sep. 8 2010 at 8:56 pm
BrookeAlison SILVER, Rancho Santa Fe, California
8 articles 0 photos 15 comments
When I read that over I sounded really harsh haha I just mean that you could have heard it from someone but it was a really great story otherwise

on Sep. 8 2010 at 8:55 pm
BrookeAlison SILVER, Rancho Santa Fe, California
8 articles 0 photos 15 comments
I think I have heard this story before from a pastor, except it wasn't a grandfather, it was a father, and the keys were inside the bible. Are you sure you made this up yourself?

palha6 SILVER said...
on Sep. 8 2010 at 12:08 am
palha6 SILVER, Brooklyn, New York
6 articles 1 photo 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;I dont believe in working harder but instead, in working smarter.&quot;

I appreciate that coolconnie. It means alot, thank you!

coolconnie said...
on Sep. 8 2010 at 12:07 am
WoW! I loved it! It was amazing. I hope everyone takes time to read it. You should publish it into a book.

palha6 SILVER said...
on Sep. 7 2010 at 6:54 pm
palha6 SILVER, Brooklyn, New York
6 articles 1 photo 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;I dont believe in working harder but instead, in working smarter.&quot;

Thanks lyssa28. Glad you liked it!

lyssa28 BRONZE said...
on Sep. 7 2010 at 6:45 pm
lyssa28 BRONZE, Las Vegas, Nevada
2 articles 0 photos 89 comments
That was amazing! It really does send out a good message