Dear April,


Did you know I’ve met my favorite pop singer? Yeah, I’ve met him and ya know I was like, so totally embarrassed. I can’t believe I was such an idiot! I don’t think I can, like, go around anything that has to do with him ever again. So, this is, like, what happened.
Ya know how I absaposativafreakingloutly. LOVE this certain pop singer? Well, I hared he was doing a concert in Louisville gardens and ya know I just HAD to go, I mean, like what kind o f obsessive fan would I bee if I didn’t? Sooooooooooooooooooooooooo, I asked my parents if I could go and guess what they said…NO!?!?!? What the hell! Can you believe that? How could they not let me go, it’s like… like… unthinkable. I mean, it was like this once in a lifetime opportunity to see him LIVE and they wouldn’t let me go. Well I fixed that problem. I snuck out and they didn’t even realize I was gone. HA!
So me and my BFF, Lacy, drove in my brand new, pink convertible all the way to Louisville and the concert was FANTABULOS! You should have neen there, he was dancing and everything, sure he was lip syncing, but like, whatever, another certain pop star lip-syncs and people still like her, and plus she wears a wig, uh, hello, weird.
So, anyways, after the concert we got in my convertible and Lacy was all like, let’s go get some coffee and I was all like that’s a fantabulos idea. So we drove to one of those high priced coffee shop chains and went inside to get our coffee and while I was ordering my tall diet mocha- choc-latte frozen cappuccino with drizzled Carmel and chocolate, you will never guess who walked in… IT WAS HIM, OMIG!!!!!! He was at that coffee shop, the coffee shop I chose to go to, MY coffee shop! Naturally I stated hyperventilating. I couldn’t believe it; I almost thought I was dreaming! So, I calmed myself down and calmly walked over to him, knocking three people to the ground, injuring two with sever head trauma and killing one, but I didn’t care about them, all I cared about was my idol. So with tears in my eyes, I walked straight up to him, stuck my hand in his face and waved hi, but then, omig- POP- his nose flew off his face, out the drive through window and into some guy’s latte.
So, like, how are you?
Your friend,
Lilith