Did you ever wonder what it would be like to be a simple bacterium, A Culture of Cultures sitting in a petri dish, soaking up the moisture and doing nothing except multiplying? You would simply relax and eat up all that pink stuff which looks like jello. No need to work, no need to learn. What can you possibly need to learn about eating? Except for the fact that you're a simple one-celled bacterium and probably would require a little help in telling the difference between your mouth and your "release valve." But other than that, there's nothing really difficult about being a bacterium. Yep, I sure wish I was part of a bacteria culture.

Think about it. The human race has so many complications. You have wars, different sexes fighting for power, and who knows what else. If you're a single-celled creature, you don't live long enough to fight. You're asexual, and you don't have a brain to know what else. You live a life that's free of worries. Well, no worries except for one. The problem of how to get food. How is it possible to get food, especially if it takes you about a year to travel a meter?

Easy. You have eager minded little scientists take care of that for you. They bring you food (that pink jello stuff), and you eat it up. And when your supply gets low, there they are again to feed you. No need to worry about anything. And the best thing about being a bacterium is the stardom that comes with it.

Every day, you're under the spotlight as a microscope zooms in to give you your close-up. There, you get to show off your talents. You can start whipping your flagella and start moving around and maybe have a race with your fellow paramecium. Or, you can show off your supreme shape shifting skills as an amoeba.

It's simply without question. Because you missed evolution when it last rolled around, you lack the complexities of life. And its the simplicity that makes the life in a culture dish undoubtedly, a culture of cultures. 1