I see her. As she walks down a tree lined road and stops to inspect the kaleidoscope of leaves scattered on the ground. This used to be our spot. We would always run here to escape the chatter of our peers or the plague of our responsibilities. I always loved how beautiful she looked  in the rays that break though the leaves. The sun reflecting off her auburn hair and pale skin. The only thing that seemed brighter was her wide smile when she laughed. But she wasn’t laughing now, she hadn’t laughed much in the passing months. Still watching, I see her reach into her pocket and pull a token. It took less than a second for me to come to the realization that the token was from our last date. It was old and faded, I could barely make out the golf ball with the crossing flags that had been engraved on the surface. It feels like a lifetime since then, a lifetime since that day. I don’t even need to debate, that it was the happiest day of my life. As she stares down at the token, that she had placed perfectly in the center of her hand, tears start to cascade and closes her fist around it. I want to run to her, but my feet have cemented themselves to the dirt. I hate seeing her like this. It feels as if someone had stabbed me in my heart and then left the blade in my chest. As she starts to walk back down the path, my feet freed themselves and I was allowed to follow close behind. I didn’t want to get too close in fear of frightening her or upsetting her further. I just needed to see her. I followed her to the front steps of her apartment, our apartment. She began to dig for her keys and quickly realized she had left them inside. “Look under the rock,” I whispered under my breath. She bent down and checked under the rock to find a small key marked “Adrians Spare”. She pressed the key into the lock and rushed in the door. I managed to slip through before it shut, but I swear it was as if I went right through the wall. After I had my focus back to her, I saw her bent over the sink with the water running, but she wasn’t doing anything. She just sat, staring at the loud, running water. Why hadn’t she done anything, or at the very least turned it off. I then saw why. I saw her there, weighed down by a cloud of suffering. She was torn by the loneliness and longing to just have someone there. I used to be that for her. I can not keep myself any longer. I try to run to her but an unknown force just shoves me further and further away. It’s like I’m fenced in a ring awaiting to be slaughtered. Sitting there pleading to help her and she can’t hear my voice. This is what that driver did to her, me, us. If he hadn’t been so stupid I would still be there with her and she wouldn’t have to bare this pain. Thanks to him, I’m stuck in this purgatory. Just watching the love of my life crumble into someone who is almost unrecognisable. I want to help her. But only the living can help the living while the dead sit and stare. All I can do is watch. All I can see is her. I see her.