“Things don’t change. You change your way of looking, that’s all,” – Carlos Castaneda. That’s what I realized seeing through my new eyes. True friends. Easy for some to have and hard for others to get. Trusting. Sharing.  Enjoying. Friends don't judge you. Friends support you when you need them the most. Friends exhibit all of these characteristics. For me, opening my eyes was probably the hardest challenge of my childhood.

You could say I had an ordinary, boring childhood. I would do what my classmates told me to do, so I wouldn’t feel distant from anyone. In truth, I hid my true personality. I would spend time with the “cool kids” of my grade because my ideology was: if I spend time with them, I would be considered cool and popular, even if I couldn’t be myself around them. I was the one who never really knew how to fit in with the other kids and the one who was always scared of what others thought of him. The one who could never express oneself and always had thoughts of what to do if this happens or if that happens. I kept all my thoughts inside my head, and when they overflowed, I would release it in my journal like I was writing a novel.  I wanted to spend time with people, live a social life, and importantly have fun. I never really took a stand until one event changed my perspective.
I lived in Colorado for most of my life. I attended Ridgeview Elementary school in third grade, and I had been going to school with the same kids for three years now. I would always participate in the conversations of the cool kids, Jacob, Olivia, Raphael, and Kyle, even if I wasn’t invited. Kyle, who acted like the group leader, had black hair, the nicest smile, and a guy who all the girls liked, asked all of us if we would like to come over to his place and play with the new, humongous outdoor playground his parents recently bought for him. He lived across the street from me and next door to Jacob. All the kids said that would be an awesome idea and that they were in, except for me. I was thinking about going, but I remembered how much my momma used to tell me to stay away from that Jacob Stanley. “That boy is up to no good and very obnoxious” are the words I would hear from my momma’s voice ringing inside my head. Yet, I still agreed to meet them after dinner.

After the whole day of school passed, I arrived home to eat one of my favorite dinners- tender and juicy pork chops with a side of Kraft macaroni and cheese. After dinner, I walked over to Kyle’s house. Having entered the backyard, I could not speak! That was one of the most beautiful playground sets I had ever seen in my life. This wooden playground had three swings, two plastic slides detached from the ground, a firm net climber, and a monkey bar.  All of us played on it, having fun, and running until we didn’t have a breath. And there stood Jacob - the loudest one, the fastest one, the strongest one, the crazy one. Wanting to test out the slides, I started to run towards them. Slides excited me every time I went to the park. That is exactly what Kyle had…a mini park! I would climb to the upper level of the slide, slide down, and climb back again. After finishing sliding for my fifth time, I realized on the ground right in front of the slide I had dropped my Batman action figure I always carried in my pocket.  I reached down to pick it up when suddenly I remember hearing, “Andres, look out!” My first reaction was to look up. The bottom tip of the slide was coming up towards my face. I got knocked out. I opened my eyes after a few minutes, and I could only see through one eye. Half of my face felt like it got kicked by black belt karate master. Everyone was around me - Jacob, Olivia, Raphael, and Kyle. They all looked at me with faces of disgust and of pain.

I asked, “What’s wrong, guys? What’s with the looks?”

It was nerve wracking not knowing what happened especially as the group’s facial expressions progressively became worse and worse.

Olivia replied, “Well, you got knocked out and have been out for a few minutes. What happened was—.“
Jacob interrupted her, “Nothing happened. You’re fine.”

“No, he’s not. Look at his face.”

Raphael stepped in, “You got hit by a slide. Jacob kicked it even after he was told not to. And it hit your eye.”
I reached towards my eye, and I could feel it warm, as it grew bigger and smoother. It now felt like my half of my face gained a weight of its own . . . almost like a tumor
Kyle said, “Go home, and show your mom.”

I was new at this. I never got hurt. I never got hit by a slide. But the truth, slowly but surely, was coming out that I had a severe black eye. The biggest clue was exactly when I saw my mother’s look of horror at my face.
“Son! What on earth happened to you?”

Momma took me straight to Jacob’s house. I told her it was my fault, mostly because I couldn’t stand seeing others getting in trouble, especially one of my cool friends. But, she knew it had to be Jacob. We knocked on the door, and Jacob’s parents came out. They apologized but wanted to hear me explain who’s at fault.

“I guess it’s my fault,” I said.
My mom was livid.
“How can you lie like that?”

I walked home and realized I had made the worst mistake of my life. Jacob wasn’t my friend. If he were, he would have stepped in and apologized. But he didn’t. That’s not a true friend. I guess that’s what I deserved for being someone that I’m not and for associating with the cool kids just for the status of being popular. After a week or two of putting cream on my eye, I finally started opening my eye.

When I was starting 4th grade at Odyssey Elementary, I had had enough of being that shy kid. I had a fresh start. I took action. I was determined to be unique. To be myself. To be the true Andres. Therefore, I started to get more involved in class discussions. I shared my ideas, raised my hand to answer the teacher’s questions, and listened to others.  I communicated more with others during lunch and school activities. And, I enjoyed reading. That’s actually how I got to meet my first true friend, Katie.

Katie’s interests were the same as mine. . . we liked to read, draw, play games, play sports. She was always there for me. Katie would help me when I didn’t understand something, or when she saw that I was in a bad mood. She would always look to find an answer. I was a pretty cool kid according to Katie. After getting to know me, she said that I had some “really awesome ideas” and that I was a good friend. We had that trust, the laughter, and the sharing that I haven’t had with anyone else, and we still do. To my classmates, I was “awkward” and “weird,” but that was what distinguished me among the rest. It was a good awkward and a good weird because I would be the distinguished one, and everyone would talk to me. All that made me happy was that I was being me.

This obstacle did change me for the better. I learned that when life doesn’t go your way, make the way you have go. You have to adjust. I did. Even when I was with those popular “friends,” I continued to think and work independently. I knew that getting good friends like Katie would take time. I just had to be myself. I couldn’t act like someone that I’m not. I learned to have confidence in what I believe in and to have the courage to express it. We are all different. If we all had the same attributes, the same way of thinking, the same interests, the world wouldn’t be what it is today. Consequently, I believe being ourselves and seeing things through our own eyes helps the world be a better place.