I found myself in the middle of a new town. I held onto my auntie’s hand as the crowds of people were bumping into us. I looked around in curiosity and studied the pale faces that went by, it was new to me, and I began to compare their skin to mine. I was confused as to why my skin did not look like theirs or why I didn't look like them. I was then eager to have their perfect white complexion. 

I was a brown skinned young girl who had yet a lot to experience. I was not capable of embracing my roots or who I truly was. I rather preferred to be those who’d often walk past me. I envied the way they were treated with respect while we received glares. “ No matter how bad it can be, you will need to accept.” My aunt used to say, and it eventually took a while for it to finally sink in. 

Moving to a different school was rough. I was often lonely and the kids there were ruthless. I was frequently told, “your skin looks weird; it looks ugly.” There were times when I got shoved by other girls who had pale skin and mistreated by those who were meant to teach. The hatred towards my own self grew throughout the years of attending school. And I thought that if I was not brown, would I be treated differently?

It became more of a challenge to learn that I will never end up looking like them. As much as I scrubbed hard for the brown color to fade, I had no choice but to accept who I am. The more I grew the more aggressive the remarks became. I wasn’t able to express the bitterness I felt towards myself and made me realize how lonely I felt all over again. 

Despite wanting to be someone else, I slowly began to gain an understanding of what my aunt has told me in the past. And when I began to mature, I learned to cherish my name, my appearance, my roots, and my color. It was clear to me that I wasn’t alone even if it felt like it. I learned from an unforgettable mistake that felt like a scar I had left behind, which was that I shouldn't be influenced by another complexion just to fit in. I was finally able to embrace my true self.